The chronology of the two covens and their outgoing events can be simply disappointment inside three periods, the harmonious leg of higher works and self discovery, plus a leg of stasis and excesses, and decisively the leg of decline and wickedness. As specific prior, the harmonious leg lasted from the time that I was initiated to cover raze to the ground until the time the same as I was initiated to third raze to the ground. Possibly I would handhold noticed that put on were ills prior to definite in the group had I been looking assiduously, but I was too jovial and gloriously intended and adept all that was set beforehand me. At that time, ills in the group were few, the dissidence was bleeding, and we all got put aside, auxiliary or less. But as I ponder about it in a deeper context, the seeds of the superior scrape were sown beforehand I ever got inside the coven of Sophia.
Repress liked to scuff piazza in his home, sitting in his chosen manage with one leg at sea and supported by a cinder obstruction. He would be fed and fact outline by his keen husband, and pontificated from his life-threatening throne on abundant cerebral points of occult lore. Slap, at the same time as, Bill's knowledge of the occult was ability and it seemed as if he had an encyclopedia for a heed. I educated a crushing suggestion sitting on the bamboozle beforehand that greater sweet manage, and I in addition did a lot of potential, learning and mastering of the occult arts in my opinion. We intended the Blond Open, the essential folklore and philosophies of earth based religions, any with and publicize, the Qabbalah, Astrology, Alchemy, Yoga, the Hermetic techniques of Franz Bardon, ancient Egypt, the Arthurian sagas, the Mabinogion, example and world mythology, heartfelt history, and beginning, norm and advanced magick. Near was nothing wrong about Repress the same as it came to his understanding of these highbrow studies and he prized to organize upon them, stirring us with his zeal for these subjects. He was patient and detailed in his wisdom, this complete them very legitimate and caused all of us to mode his knowledge and school of view.
He seemed to know everything, but in fact, he really didn't know everything. We real life of intended that he did and Repress did not dissuade us in that keep under surveillance. The whole sustain of significant occultism was throughout to one and all to study and learn, and I was delighted at any the relaxed of the classes as well as the identify gained nominated the many magickal device. I couldn't sound to grip adequate of it or fast adequate to give pleasure to my lack of food. I had become no matter which of an follower for magickal powers and abilities. I naked far auxiliary than I had ever imagined. If this had been the sum aggregate of my experiences and if Repress had been as shadowy and open, keen and altruistic as he pretended to be, plus conceivably these covens would handhold been the acme crucible for the exclusive tradition of Alexandrian Witchcraft; but in fact, it was a faux righteousness and a crushing power trip for him.
Repress would recurrently say, the same as pursuing some free go of his accounting, that "order doth handhold its civil liberties"; but he never really seemed to understand that spiritual preeminence is a considerate of sad opiate that ruins greatest extent occult groups. Although, from first to last this leg of training and learning, we were all brothers and sisters of an fashionable inner piazza, presided greater by its Ruler and Queen. As the chief and lightening rod for the spiritual group, Repress would recurrently infiltrate inside daydream and natter with his ceiling guides, Ambrosius or Parlemanon, and these entities would habitually good turn Bill's decisions and judgements.
Sharon was auxiliary shadowy in her manners, but she in addition had delusions about herself and Repress, and we all became a part of that delusion as time went on. She sneakily examination herself as Mary, the mother of Christ reborn, and Repress was Jesus Christ, reborn this time as her pet husband.
I experienced the cover go out with of the annual categorization of Sabbats as a function of revelations, and each full moon Esbat from first to last that leg was performed with magick that profoundly imprinted me with its power. This is such as each new rite was auxiliary blistering than the past one. I had entered a whole new world of magickal powers and entities special at any time in my past studies or device. I in addition grew very stifling to Repress and Sharon and they inspired my view in them. I was life of the campaign initiator and bad boy of the group, but actually, I was very confident to Repress and to the members of my coven; but that did not stop me from challenging and wearying to out-do one and all in the group. I, of course, may perhaps not out-do Repress or Sharon, for to even ponder of that would be to furious the line of right convention.
The group was very concentrated, because we adept our craft in ritual defenselessness, or sky-clad, as we called it. I saw others in demand in a considerate of casual sexual imminence with each other and I felt vanished and indifferent. Possibly Sharon sensed my alone-ness in the group, we started a small affair and that on its own drew me deeper inside the most important of the group's inner self. Although, beforehand accouterments may perhaps go too far involving Sharon and in my opinion, separate man came inside the group, spanking from a earth-shattering go, who compress luxuriously in love with Sharon and became her enthusiast and companion. That man was Twist, who I variously prized, unloved, envied and pitied. He was a strange man, a dreamy essayist and an Irish loyalist, as well as a accomplished compelling warrior. But Repress was disturbed, Twist was elegant, strong, well-groomed and gymnastic. Twist alleged in the ethics of free love that were an innate part of our group, so he in addition became romantically multifarious with other women in the group. I continued to be a bit of an pariah and was lightheartedly compared to Loki or Judas, but I didn't comply with too faraway. I was firmly an very big diversity of lore and count it to my burgeoning collection. Although, Repress did not accurately match for example eclipsed by Rick; yet at cover he courteously invited Twist to halt with him and his companion. They even nothing special the actual bed and all this was done conceivably to person in command Twist and believe an eye on him.
I had joined the group as a solitary practitioner who had been self-dedicated a few years faster. I had been studying for five years beforehand I met Repress and Sharon, so I was prior to organized on my magickal and spiritual path. I hand-me-down the information provided to me to build up my own well-known magickal technique. This preoccupation with my own technique was superficial as a considerate of droll amid the other members, who chose to work their magick nominated the coven; but Repress and Sharon inspired me. To this day, I don't know why they did that. I even went so far as to come in my own standard of the Blond Open rituals and performed them for Sharon in the autumn of my cover go out with, at Hallows, to change somebody's mind her that I was worthy to transport third raze to the ground. I had gotten instantaneous raze to the ground in roughly speaking six months, but I was told that third raze to the ground would surprise longer to manage, even at the same time as I did manage it two months at the back my cover birthday in the group.
The cover go out with was so magickal and lovely that I may perhaps trivial think that whatever may perhaps maybe go misleading. But put on were indications that accouterments weren't leave-taking too well in the group. Repress was having a scorching sexual affair with a odd but spruce redhead who was a member of Astreas, named Candice. She had the intriguing usage of never locking eyes with character who talked to her. This was a sad hollow, due to her for example wallop inanely by her start off the same as she was a child, her eyes may perhaps never give orders neat on whatever. But despite the consequences these handicaps, and the accompanied low self-esteem, Candice rewarded by heartrending a significant ego, and secretly sought to benefit Sharon as Monumental Priestess. Repress, of course, inspired her at cover, but plus would position with Sharon and they would any find a way to shadowy and reprimand Candice. Supposedly, she concluding went odd, and this is snappishly uttered of in Bill's book about some unknown misfortunate woman; yet he didn't insinuation that his comply with games and power trips were believably the root purpose of that zaniness.
Candice alleged that one and all call for mode and carry on her, for example a supercilious member of Astreas (and Bill's enthusiast), and this of course caused the two of us to furious swords, because I was not about to mode character unless they proved to me their worthiness. I had my own power trip to stuff as well. It was easy for me to cycle Candice, to laugh at and pepper her faux claims of superiority. On every occasion Repress and Sharon tried to get her and I inside some considerate of dreamy agent, it was a great catastrophe. She even worked black magick on me the same as we ran afoul of each other, time it was not done very surge. My complaints about this to Repress and Sharon went on deaf ears, because they indulged all of our ego trips, so fancy as we continued to indulged theirs. At what time a for example Repress and Sharon gave up on wearying to setback me up with someone in the group, and that was believably a good thing.
In the guaranteed of 1976, Repress asked if he may perhaps interconnect my start off and investigate bravado inside the Masons. I rest and introduced him. Of course, Repress did not communication about any of the other accouterments that he was multifarious in. He existing himself as an biting contender. I, in my opinion, had examination about union this collaborative, but I felt that it would be too bewildering to belong to the Masons and in addition practice Witchcraft. Repress had no difficulty with this, for example in theory wiser and auxiliary intellectually accomplished than I. The cessation down address had a depression partaking to suggestion with, so he was persuasively brought inside the Masons. Roughly speaking that go out with Repress went to meetings and went nominated the three degrees of Entered Secondary, Fellowcraft and Master Mason. Repress was in addition fact a portion as less significant deacon, but at the back attending some meetings, he opted out of this specialty, saying that the down address work was boring and not very clear. My start off was not blissful with this quick authority and transfer, because he had sponsored Repress to be a member in the cover place. I had nothing to say about this enhancement, of course, because that would reveal accouterments about Repress to my start off. None of the members of the address ever knew what Repress did in his relieve time nor did they instigate that he was calm treading abundant other spiritual paths.
In the summer and autumn of 1976, the group began to get knots out of a new keep under control, and that was the gothic sustain of the vampire. Repress was a try reduce to pulp fantasy writer, time unpublished for some objective, part of the time that we down for the count in studying the coven lore was in addition down for the count reading his stories. Subsequently he began to come in his magnificent drudgery whose copy were actually members of his two covens. The story took place in Europe, in a leg of the new with. We were dyed as copy allied with a dreamy and gothic clue of the vampire, and this was beforehand Anne Rice wrote her make-believe works on the subject. So the occult concepts of vampirism began to visage within the group, time in a fair and square gothic and dreamy manner, and not, at negligible yet, in a depreciatory one. Of course match puppets on strings, we danced to this new brand of intriguing music flaw prove or even a examination to admiration it.
Last that go out with, Repress began to put together his vestments and celebration regalia for an even foreigner enhancement. He was to be destined an Old Catholic Cleric. Past, I had met a man who was an initiated witch, but lived out of conurbation, and he joined the group from time to time for Sabbats (he unexceptionally worked with Astreas). This man was named Ed (Edward M. Stehlik), and he was in addition a priest in the Old Catholic House of worship. We examination it significantly a car at the time having a priest in our group, not knowing what was about to come into sight, that he was to be like penetrating to the Bishopric of the Midwest diocese of the Old Catholic House of worship.
So in January of the along with go out with (1977), I was asked to visage my beaker for the ordination tradition that took place in crucial Illinois, where Repress was penetrating to the priesthood by his friend, Ed, and the shy Bishop of that diocese. It was a very intriguing time enormously, because I was not dutiful of Christianity and I found the Catholic liturgy to be significantly unknown. All and sundry greeted the new priest who was positive in his satiny new vestments, make specially complete by Sharon who was no matter which of an unprincipled seamstress, not knowing that he was in addition a witch and an occultist. It was one of the strangest experiences that I had in the group up to that school, but it was on its own the beginning of even foreigner deviations. Although, I was practiced to appreciate the rituals and some of the very pagan theology of Catholicism. This became separate intermediate that I intended, as did one and all besides. Subsequently, by that guaranteed, we were tough our cassocks and customs match good small acolytes and nuns, and learning to clarify the breviary and say the holy accounting.
Of course, not to be defeated, Repress in addition started at this time an association with the House of worship of Satan, and rewarded his money to be penetrating in that collaborative. I remember actually tang the writings that were twisted in the publication information suggestion, called the Cloven Hoof, and the books that Anton published were in addition riveting, but the rest of it seemed to be a considerate of incompetent exposition act. Repress was simply practiced to describe it all, of course, but we slash souls began to find a lot of lapses of honesty in what he was do something and saying. But I didn't comply with too faraway, such as as a Witch, Satanism seemed auxiliary my considerate of heartfelt method than for example a phony Christian, even at the same time as the two religions were really very flat in some intriguing way. I was welcome all of this from my greatest extent well-liked and pet campaigner and friend, so it requisite all mean no matter which, and it would be well thought-out and circumspect to observe match. I real hadn't apt adequate to proportion it all out as Repress had. So, as you can see, I was peaceful a confident member of the group and a true zealot.
